Randomness

First thoughts are:

1) I should have done this 10 years ago.
2) WTF am I thinking?
3) I’m excited!
4) I need a paper bag to breathe into, because I’m so nervous.

I am going back to school. (Okay, cue the paper bag again!)

I am NOT going to stop doing weddings. Like, EVER. I’ll be wheeling my walker around churches when I’m 95 years old. I can picture it now. I’ll be using a Canon 150D MK MCMXLIV. (Digress, digress, digress!) Actually, running this business makes me only want to learn more. I’m excited to obtain more business knowledge, in addition to what I’ve learned already.

But I’m so afraid. I’m going to be 10 years older than my classmates. When you’re 18, that’s a lifetime – am I an old fuddyduddy?? Does the fact that I just said fuddyduddy make it even more obvious?
…I’m going to get eaten alive, aren’t I?

I didn’t do this when I was 18 – because I didn’t know what I wanted to do. Who knows that at 18? What I DID know is that I knew way too many people with way too much debt who hated the degree decision they made. I knew for a fact I didn’t want that. I always DID want more education for myself, but at the right time, with the right decisions and reasons behind it – not because that was what I was supposed to do. (Does that make me rebellious, or self-aware?) I always said I would take a year, and gain some life experience, and then know myself a little better, rather than diving in head first without knowing what to do.
That year turned into 10. (Oops.) But I wouldn’t change anything. I love my life. I love my business and photography! It IS what I want to do when I grow up.

I go through phases of Excitement vs. Do I really want to do this?!
Then I realize how badly I do want this – because I want to be the best ME I can be.
The same way I want to be the best photographer I can be is why I spend countless hours on photography forums, reading photography books, researching new gear, new techniques — perfecting my craft.
A university education is just the next step in my life path. I’m so looking forward to what’s coming my way!

Even though I’m a fuddyduddy.
Okay… I’m going to have to stop using that word. Now.